A lot of people misinterpret the lyrics of this track and think it is a song about cats. It is absolutely NOT a song about cats. It's about Your Cat.
lyrics
Keep You Cat away from me, I don't know where its been. Your Cat's the most disgusting thing that I have ever seen. It licks itself in places, where it shouldn't lick itself and I'm convinced the dirty bastard's detrimental to my health. Your Cat got fat and bloated on the Whiskas it was served, but when you took Your Cat to get it spayed, it got what it deserved. Your Cat sits there meowing at my window, dusk 'til dawn. I guess that's just its way of telling me it shit all on my lawn.
Keep Your Cat away from me please, with its weird eyes and its filthy, catty grin. That thing is a breeding ground for fleas, so when I get your cat alone, I'll throw it in the bin.
It's rolling on the floor again, it thinks I'll stroke its belly, but I'm not going to do that 'cause Your Cat is f****** smelly. Your Cat thinks it's adorable when it begins to purr, but there's no chance in hell I'll ever touch that crappy, matted fur. Your Cat has got ideas about sitting on my lap, its almost like it doesn't realise it's cruising for a slap. 'Cause when I see your cat, my eyes get bloodshot and wet, but it's not allergies, it's nausea towards your horrid pet.
Keep that furry t*** locked up indoors, its feline bull**** wears my patents thin. I hate its stupid tail and rubbish paws, so when I get Your Cat alone, I'll throw it in the bin.
Your Cat is so self-satisfied, it won't admit defeat. When I drop it on its head, it still lands, smugly, on its feet. But Your Cat can think again if it thinks its ever going to win, it won't matter which way up it lands when I throw it in the bin.
credits
from Bishops Itchington,
released December 16, 2011
Vocals, ukulele - Steve Grainger
Synth - Alex Caithness
A folk punk comedy trio from the Midlands, consisting of
Steve - Ukulele and Vocals,
Alex - Bass and Vocals,
Ben - Box, triangle, other percussive geometry