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Great Expectations

from Bishops Itchington by Uke's Not Dead

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lyrics

You look gorgeous lying next to me. I may not blow your mind tonight, it's been a year or three. There's not been many: 3.5 and counting, so don't expect too much and it won't be as disappointing as I'd feared. Yes, I am quite weird. I hide my low self-confidence underneath my beard. We should get undressed, but taking off my clothes in front of nice girls makes me stressed. Is that cute, or just plain scary? Yes, my upper arms are quite unusually hairy and so is that. I've got condoms underneath my socks, in my bottom drawer, just blow the dust off from the box and check the date. I hope we're not too late. I found them at the freshers' fair in 2008. And since, I've been alone. Do you think we'll finish this before my Mum gets home? Whoaaaahh yeah! Well, that answers my question. Whoooaaaah yeah! Take it as a sign of my affection. Whoooaaaah yeah! You are really sexy. Whooooaah yeah! No, I don't mind calling you a taxi. On your way home, maybe you'll decide to go on Facebook on your phone and change your status. Next time we speak, say you fell in love tonight, despite my poor technique. I hope you do. 'Cause darling, I love you. If you no longer want me, well I guess that's OK too. I'd love it if you stayed, but I will still be happy that I finally got laid. I can't believe I finally got laid.

credits

from Bishops Itchington, released December 16, 2011
Ukulele, vocals - Steve Grainger
Bass, drums, percussion - Alex Caithness

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about

Uke's Not Dead Birmingham, UK

A folk punk comedy trio from the Midlands, consisting of
Steve - Ukulele and Vocals,
Alex - Bass and Vocals,
Ben - Box, triangle, other percussive geometry

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